ME TO CENA: You can't see me! LOL

The line about the only thing running down Cena's leg was p*ss was AWESOME! I love love Lesnar's M.O about being simply an a** kicker and how he'll bring legitimacy back to Smackdown.

Is it just me, or is Brock Lesnar the best heel WWE has had in many, many years! I can't wait to see if his wrestling skills now have more of a MMA feel (minus the ground grapples)

NXT IS FUCKING BRILLIANT.

After a couple of weeks of missing it, I was able to drop seamlessly back in to the best and worst longest running weekly episodic television programme (with yellow ropes, on a website, not including OVW).

Here's what happened, and possibly an explanation what might have been missed. I'm not fucking checking though, it's all guess work.

- So apparently ChocCock have gone from running a doubler on Tamina to arguing over her affections, which is totally fine on account of the fried gold the segments will brew up. Titus in his late 80s Hall of Fame suit gave her a coconut tree, because he's a Playa from the Himalyas, y'all. Naturally this pissed off D-Young because he had been meaning to give her a coconut tree for WEEKS! You snooze you lose, D-Money. Tamina was wet, Titus was chuffed, Darren was mugged off. Lots more steam in this one.

- The hunt for Matt Striker (which didn't account for the fact he was a prominant feature of Wrestlemania weekend coverage) came to an end when Hawkins and Reks admitted they had nicked off with him and chucked him in the broom closet. They did that to get Maxine to get something out of Regal, but none of that was yet brushed upon. It's NXT, we still have slow build round here, remember. He was found by Baitlyn who wonderfully broke the fourth wall in that gorgeous NXT fashion, agreeing to find him "just to get in the mix and see what happens". That's how it works on this show, it's basically a load of kids in a school playground looking for adventure which may or may not include matches every now and then. Lovely stuff. Anyway, the baddies had tied up Striker but left behind Hawkins' joke shop cane, which Striker resolved he would use to solve his problem.

- Johnny Curtis beat Percy Watson just because. Frankly Watson is dead meat since they robbed him of his tache, shades and catchphrase, so he's the best jobber for the hottest show on telly. Regal put over Curtis' weirdness being a big positive for his attacking game, which was probably to foreshadow the mini-push he's going to get ahead of putting Goldberg over as his first big angle. The match was a total dud unfortunately, but as mentioned above, Maxine was snaking Regal, which was infinitely more interesting anyway. Later when the pair confronted Reks and Hawkins about Striker's escape, Curtis sung Alanis Morisette in a falsetto. Good shit.

- There was a looooong Raw Rebound this week which featured pretty much the entire Brock/Cena pull apart brawl. Weakest segment of this week's NXT, naturally, but I can see why they're trying to get the NXT faithful to call their mates and try and translate the huge numbers onto the Red Brand.

- The third match of what I'd imagine will be a 47-match series took place and Michael McGillicutty and Tyson Kidd had another surprisingly good encounter. Mike Perfect's in the form of his life actually. He's done some damage on the mic, pulling apart Tyson's claim to the Hart legacy, and has laid out threats that seem to imply kicking in some of the Hart Family themselves. I'd really like to see him run up and push Bret of a motorbike or something. Anyroads, after a marvellous yellow video package to let us know where they're at with each other (and, I'd imagine, to show more of Kidd's zip-waist coat for the "As Seen on TV" section of wweshop.com). This was probably their best so far. Kidd did some sort of armlock submission for the win, and the crowd actually cared. Highest praise for this show. 2-1 to Kidd.

Excellent show as usual, get it watched.

Former IC Champ did go to Japan and made an impact there, he won gold, or rather silver there, so it's not too far off...

And he is a heel, of course he will use any help he can get, plus the mist was always "poisonous" in any company, and the colors vary on the effects of it too.

Also as some of you know, I am an indy worker, and I just made a small Facebook page, feel free to "Like" the page and help me out

http://www.facebook.com/omgijh

BREAKING NEWS: D-Young & Titus fucking beat The Usos on Smackdown this week! Maybe this was to satiate the huge UK demand for them to get promoted to the main shows?

Summerslam Double Main Event of somebody vs. Brock AND Big Show/Khali vs. ChocCock for the Tag Titles?

Whilst we could all be morning the loss of an awesome act on the number one brand, I like to think we're a selfless bunch who just want recognition for the talent. To that end, this is great news, and I can only hope Tamina follows them so we can continue that storyline and I'll actually have a proper reason to stick with Smackdown.

NXT and Smackdown spoiler, that was. But you know how we roll in here.

The main NXT show sees Hawkins and Reks getting sacked by Regal, so even bigger roster changes may be afoot, maybe the long awaited debut of Goldberg? but I'll comment more on that when I've seen the show.

Thats a good question. It would be an extra added twist if Brock might sometime use a MMA style submission move on Cena and make him tap. Oh sure, he'll still use the F5, but the added effect of Brock being a legit "shooter" will just add more fuel to the fire against someone who's just a "sports entertainer".

Tessmaker is back!!!!!!!

And she got the pin on Gail Kim in her first time out!

I'm really curious as to what the plans are for Open Fight Night. Who exactly are they going to bring into TNA to face one of the champions once a month?